Silverana on her way to gold

[Hollister76]

^That's what keeps me from fully restricting. The chocolate and cookies...I don't know why, because I'm all about calories and stuff (obsessive) but I can't resist them.

[silverana]

Hey guys!
Sorry for not posting for such a long time! Our internet didnt work and still isnt working. So I think it will take some time until I come here regularly again.
Actually my goal was to weigh 42 again when school starts. That is three days ago now and my weight is not even near to 42! I dont know why and how but Im so disgustingly fat again! I weigh something between 46 and 47! At first I thought that was because of my period which I got a few days ago. And, well, my stomach did get a little bit flatter again, but not as flat as it used to be! It seems like I have to start from the whole beginning! But if thats the only way, of course Ill do it. When I first got skinny it was also in the last year of my old school. (You change the school from the 10th to the 11th grade, I dont know what this would be in america or somewhere else). Anyway, so this is my last year at that school and the last year I have to go to school at all!! So I think really positive that I can make it again! And this time Ill stay skinny!

[why]

Yes... Positive thoughts Stay strong You will get there..

[silverana]

Thank you! Such words really help!

Today morning my weight was still 46,4. In the afternoon I stepped on the scale again, this time with clothes and then I weighed46,3! I hope thats something good and tomorrow Ill be under 46 again.

I dont feel well at the moment. Since the middle of the week I got headaches and a sore throat. My ears dont feel okay either, they dont hurt but they give me a feeling like Im halt deaf. I dont get the taste of anything I eat, so I hardly do it. I also got a lot of homework to do still, so Im pretty busy.
The stupid thing about the cold is that I cant go to the gym. Im already sweating the whole day I think I couldnt do ten minutes on the crosstrainer. The good thing is that I might lose weight with it. Like I maybe already did today.

[silverana]

Since the beginning of the week I stick to my plan completely. But I didnt lose anything! Or at least I cant see a change. The not-seeing-the-difference keeps me away from stepping on the scale. This would only conformate what I already suggest.
But I wont get discouraged because of that! Maybe the only reason why I didnt lose is the lack of exercise. Today is the first day for almost one week that Ill do cardio exercise again. I have to admitt that I got a bit lazy about exercising recently. The last month I went three times per week. Once I went every day. Well, I think little exercise is better than nothing. I just wish that I really got some pounds down by the end of the week!

[Jennifer]

Stay strong and start walkin hun I'm loving walking and hopefully it brings results

Good luck
Jen x x x

[silverana]

Since yesterday I got a new motivation to lose weight! My music teacher has a concert in february and our course is going to visit it! Since I got to know that he gives some I wanted to see him!
It will be in a real concert hall and Id like to wear some clothes that fit to such an environment, not just normal street clothes. I already got some and up to now they look okay on me. But they are tight and would look much better if I lose 2-4 kilos. More I wouldnt get in that short time.
I started yesterday with a new diet programme. It will be like te 246 diet.
Yesterday I had 200cals, today the plan says 300. I already feel hungry, so I hope that I can keep my discipline up.

[silverana]

Since the beginning of the week I ate really healthy and like I wrote in the post above I started the 246 diet on thursday. Today I felt confident enough to step on the scale and Im back to 45,1kg! From my look in the mirror I thought that I still stuck at 47! Now Im pretty sure that I can reach 43 or 42 kilo until the concert!

[silverana]

This week goes really well so far! On Monday I had only one banana and one apple, yesterday I hadnt more than 400 cals! Today I had a horrible urge to crave some stuff like chocolate, but I just ate one chocolate yogurt with not even 80 cals and then it was over!
I even see a change in my body shape. When I lift my arms yesterday in front of the mirror I could see my rips!!! I laughed for several minutes about it. I just felt great! Seems Im finally doing something right!
Im still scared to step on the scale though. I think I wait until my hip bones come out a little bit more, than the result should be bearable.

[silverana]

Since yesterday my control is gone!
I dont have real big binges but I dont count my cals anymore!!!

But I got to know that I will be alone at the weekend. So there will be nothing that could destroy my plan. My shape changed so much in just one week. Two days went bad, okay, but I still got two weeks until the concert. I can do that. Tomorrow Ill be back on track!!!!

[omnifabulous]

Thats awesome to here how determined you are! Good luck with the weight lose and great job so far!

[silverana]

Thank you! I really am determined to lose weight again! I think I said before that it was the last year on my old school that I reached my lowest and now its my last year on my current school. The feeling that I can do it again because I already did it in the past is stronger than before. I even use the shampoo again that I used to that time... a bit superstitious maybe but whatever.

The weekend wasnt so good as I thought it would become. I dont know if I gained because Im too scared of the scale, but my clothes still fit, my jeans arent tight again, so I hope I didnt damage my good work. Tomorrow I will restrict better. I got sport at school until 16:30 and I got to learn for a test. Hardly time to eat.
I really must get lower with my weight! Its my sisters birthday on february, 01!! This means cake!!! I know that we´ll also do some sports, first we go bowling, then comes the cake and in the evening I go to the gym. The new music to body combat is out, and I hope this one better than the last one. It took all my motivation away!!!

[silverana]

Yesterday I got it for the first to fast for one day! I chose monday because Im occupied with school until 5pm. The midday hours are the most dangerous for me, but its easy not to eat in the evening. I dont know why.
For a while I had a few strange thoughts, like if I get it to fast today, why should I eat breakfast tomorrow, or eat at all? At the same time I was scared that I really dont eat for several days and then have the biggest binge ever. So I decided to eat again today, but the desire to fast again for more than one day is still there.

[silverana]

On wednesday I fucked up completely!!!!
I ate so much!!!! Bread, yogurt, veggies, pudding, ice-cream.....!!!!

I think its impossible now that I reach 42kg in one week. It should rather be my goal for the whole month. Maybe I should start to weigh myself again. I have no idea how much I weigh! I dont know if or how much I gained since wednesday or if I lose somehting when I eat only 100cals.
Today is my sisters birthday and we´ll eat cake for sure. But I have to weigh myself tomorrow. I need more control over myself again!!!!

[silverana]

Febraury went absolutely bad so far. I weigh myself again, and the results are as high as to my beginning! Im using another scale than I used to, and I noticed that the new one shows two kilos more than the other one. Though the result is higher, one kilo lost is one kilo lost, whatever scale I use. So Ill stick to the new one.
I read that somebody in the forum lost 2,5lbs just by cutting out carbs. Things like bread, pasta are definitely one reason why I fuck up so often. So the next week I try to do it low carb, that means no more than 20gr carbs per day. I could still eat one bread then, so its possible that I can do it.