it's so hard....

[ThinMint06]

It's so hard to stay focused. I know what I want, and I know how rewarding it will be. All I can think of is how I'm making a fool out of myself because I'll never reach my goal.. I wish I could just stay on track and only eat like 500 calories a day... if that.

[Pinchme101]

i know exactly what you mean! it can be so frustrating and hard but don't worry darling! you will get throughit ! I know you can!

[ThinMint06]

So excited! I'm going to see my boyfriend for the first time in a month. This whole long distance thing sort of sucks... but it does keep him out of my food life. I wish we went to the same college. I feel so alone here... If anyone's seen "For the Love of Nancy" it's exactly like that here. No one cares if you eat, which is a relief, but also a disappointment. Why shouldn't they care? They don't notice... Well tomorrow I'm having a cleansing day and then get back on track. Now I have something to focus on. He won't even recognize me.

[DollyAna]

hey good luck hun,it is s00ooo hard,it really is but the struggle continues,boo hoo hoo.

[ThinMint06]

I am doing amazing.. I'm so proud. My cleansing day is going well and I'm living off *Sprite Zero* it's really good to be free from food. My roommate is also being a bitch to me, so it makes me feel... I guess better than her. She can be the mean one and I can be the skinny one. I wish I could stick up for myself better. I'm so pathetic I hate myself!

[DollyAna]

hey hun,i'm glad to hear you're doing amazing. your room mate sucks,try not to worry about her,easier said than done i know,but take care babe,hugs...

[ThinMint06]

This might sound crazy, but every time I feel like no one likes me, I convience myself it's because I'm too fat. And if I were thin, then they would want to be my friend and be nice to me. It's rediculous I know, but maybe it's true. It might be that all the people who are mean to me are also very thin. I can't wait to start showing off my new bod.

[LUVPink]

me and my boyfriend did long distance across the country for a whole entire year... so i know how you feel! on the plus side, i was SO miserable, but it enabled me to get down to 111 lbs... I wish I was that now... its like, I'm with him, but I cant get down from 122 lbs again!! Anyway, hang in there, we're here for you!

[DollyAna]

yes i know what you mean & it probably is rediculous,but i too feel i'd be liked more if i were slimmer,rediculous isn't it,but i sure know i'd be a million times happier if i were thinner(i know from when i was thinner before)

[ThinMint06]

Okay, so I've had some soup for lunch. It's fat free, but there was a lot of it and now I feel I don't know... stupid for having done it I guess.

I'm becoming overwhelmed with school work. I could blame the public school system for not preparing me, but I'd rather blame myself for thinking this would be a piece of cake.

This diet is a good distraction from that. I might suck at writing, but at least I can still lose weight. I'm hoping to not eat again today and I think I'll do fine. I am afraid that I won't be able to stick with it since I never do. I feel like everyone else can say no so easily. I'll get there I'm sure... I'll just have to work at it.

I've had about 300 calories today. That is enough to get me through the day. I will probably be going out to dinner and stuff with my boyfriend, so I need to get as much dieting in as possible. But he eats like a bird, so I can just mirror him.

........ Thanks for all the comments!!! THEY REALLY HELP!!!!

[DollyAna]

hey good luck with school,"dieting"(sorry i hate that word) & everthing else...try'n stay positive chick & take care..

[LUVPink]

is this your first year of college or high school? im sure its taking some adjusting but trust me, you'll get the hang of it and be fine

[ThinMint06]

Hi everyone.

I'm doing very okay today. Last night I ate a sandwich, some cheetos! and drank some chocolate milk!! I'm repulsed! I was hanging out with some of the girls down the hall and I guess I just wanted to fit in. Lame excuse, I know.

Today I had a banana and two bites of a sandwich. For the rest of the day it'll be diet pop and water. I only have a couple more days before my boyfriend is here... that is going to be a struggle. I'll try to sneak on and keep you posted. He doesn't really understand what I feel. He's 6 foot and and like 175 pounds. So of course he looks good. But I'm only 5'3"... awful! So of course there needs to be a change!

Hope everyone is having a skinny day!!

[ThinMint06]

I went to the commons and got a big gulp of diet pepsi, and a small salad, but to get the salad you have to get pizza, so i got that too. I had a couple bites of pizza because I felt so dizzy and ate the salad which was very small. I feel so weird eating in front of people. They must be looking at me like I'm a cow. Ah! Tomorrow I'm not eating at all. I hate myself. I think I'll only take these diet pills (Stacker 3's) when I eat something. Otherwise, I can't handle it.

water water water tomorrow. hope I can handle it.

[Skinny Chick78]

Thanks for breaking my fantasy lol!! I'm only 5'2, I had this image that everyone here was 5'10 and 103 lol........ You just made my day, I was feeling kind of alone. THANKS! Love ya!