my journal

[Hollister76]

I had major thinspiration last night.
I spent the night at my best friend Kylee's house (I hadn't slept over in ages, quite literally. We had holiday from school today and I didn't have to work, so I made it.) She had said her house was "kinda big" but I was NOT prepared for it. When I pulled up I literally stopped the car. It's 3 stories and they're adding on a 4th. I kid you not. This house sprawls across the landscape. It's massive. I practically fainted when she welcomed me inside- it was very personal and inviting in it's massive-ness, though. Her mom owns roughly half of the cit's businesses and it's property subsequently, she does that for a living. She's loaded. And Kylee's new stepdad (who's British, automatically winning him points in my book. Rock the accent!) is loaded, so they're set.
The cool thing is that Kylee and her brother Cole are so down to earth that you wouldn't know- and they work for their money, it's not just given to them. Not spoiled...
Amazing house.
Anyway, the thinspiration happened in her bedroom (the bedroom, I hear, is where all good things start and they started changing. They look so perfect! Man, it was insane.
Well, thinspiration comes into the picture when Kylee brings me two pairs of jeans that she said are too small and she wants me to have them. Damn, they fit. They're a 0 and a 1. I was really happy.
It gets better- we went four-wheeling (Southern girls, for you!) and I hadn't brought clothes good for gettin' dirty. Well, Kylee (I wasn't about to ask) offered to let me borrow hers. They're American Eagle and a size 0. Damn, I was so nervous but they slid right on.
Loosely.

Just hanging out with those two is thinspiring, because they're real and small. I've always pictured myself as a lot bigger than them, but apparently we're the exact same size, except I'm smaller than Kylee. She calls me "skinny thing" lol. It's confusing, but I can't let what I *feel* replace the *reality*.

Anyway, that made my day.
<3

[Hollister76]

I've discovered that Slimfast is amazing. It does curb my appetite and even quiets my screaming stomach during class. The cappechino (I think I just butchered that word with misspelling.) flavor is the best.

Oh yes, this is random but deserves notation- I had my first vodka this wkend on March 20 2008. It was good.

Love,
D

[Hollister76]

Happy Easter everyone!
Mine has been uneventful thusfar-we had a sunrise service at church, the regular church, and an egg hunt at home.

*Crazy story ahead*

This guy James asked me out last night. It's actually funny now, because I now see why he acted the way he did a few months ago.
We had volunteered together at a tutoring program for children, and apparently he had a crush on me. I thought of him as nice, but that's all really. Well, he was going out with a girl Lacy ( who also volunteered at P.A.L.S.) and I remember her staring me down icily. I had no idea he liked me, so I didn't understand her glares. I had never talked to her before. I had only talked to him once when he asked my name. Well, come to find out he told her that he liked me. Hence, she hated me.
I hadn't seen him since November until he started working at the same mall that I do. He came by yesterday and majorly flirted. I was under the impression that he was still dating Lacy, so I was polite but not flirty. Well, after I got off work I changed clothes and was roaming the mall, killing time until I was to meet up with Katelin. As I was walking, he approached me. Within ten minutes he informed me that he was single, over Lacy, interested in me, asked my number, AND asked me to his prom.. Ten minutes. He then inquired my plans for the evening. I vaguely said I was hanging out with a friend. He invited himself to come with us, which was designated a girls-night-out.
-5 points for him.
He then rode with Katelin and myself to AppleBees and actually hinted at me paying for him too.
-10 points.
The whole conversation was awkward- he tried to hold my hand, stared at me constantly, and interupted Katelin constantly to talk to me. She mentioned something pertaining to her church (she's Morman) and he grilled her, and basically went off on her about her beliefs.
Good grief.
He had to be back at work by 8:30, so we drove him back (he does in fact have his own car and leeched a ride with us) and I was polite and walked him to his work in the mall. We're walking through the door and he says "If you liked me hypothetically, would you hypothetically hold my hand?"
First of all, I just met him after months of not even seeing him. I had no crush on him, and I don't generally hold hands on the first day anyway. Secondly, he grabbed my hand rather than waiting for an answer.
We get to his work, and he PULLS me close to him to give me a big hug. If my phone hadn't gone off, I know he'd be making out *without me even wanting to*.
He's cute, nice, but moves way too fast.
Good grief.

Funny night.

[Hollister76]

Yes.
So I'm getting fed up with Daddy dearest.
Since the whole cancer fiasco, he can't do anything but lie on the couch in our den -literally. Talking wears him out; I understand this. But unfortunately the computer is in the den as well, and he's watching me like a hawk.
He never did before.
I was just on the Fading Obsession site and he said "What are you on?" My mind raced for a believable response and I supplied "It's an online journal site." to play it safe I then said "I can get off if you want me to" and he said "Good."

He's never given a fig before. I think that now that our lives have had to slow down b/c of cancer, he has the time to watch me. And of course, censor the internet. Now I've got to play it safe, I've been banned from the internet way too much before.

Rant now over.
<3

[Hollister76]

My theory was proved again!
Gabbrielle ate like crazy today because Z wasn't there.
I knew it.

Anyway, we're watching this movie in sociology class. It's called "August Rush" and it's really good. It came out recently, too. It's about a music prodegy...I love playing music, so I'm biased I suppose. Lol.

Love you all, hope you're having a skinny day.

[musicwithoutlimelight]

Sounds like that guy is a bit of a loser. I hope you don't date him! Anyways, I don't have much to say, but I just wanted to drop a line and say hi and send some skinny vibes your way!

[AlicetheCamel]

I really like reading your journal!! Seriously, somehow it's cheered me right up! Maybe it's because you're skinny, you're so positive, your writing style's so nice and chirpy...whatever it is, thank you!

However, your last post brought back some memories...argh. I really hope your dad stays well, sweetie. You're in my thoughts. x

[constance]

Hey girl,

Just checking in on you and hoping all is well. What kind of musical instruments do you play? We have 2 piano players, a flute & tin whistle player and a guitar player in our household....I am a loser and play nothing. It is one of those things that I really wish my parents had started me on.

constance

[Hollister76]

Music- Lol, you've got that right. Dear Lord in heaven, he's crazy. He called four times that night after I left and has texted me since.

Alice- thank you That's really good to hear, I'm glad it cheered you up. Do you have a journal on here?

Constance- I play the piano. I absolutely love it. Man, it sounds like yall have a lot of noise in your house- in a good way, of course. Piano is easy to pick up (but hard to keep up), you should try it.
And if you're ever in GA, my mom does give lessons.

Today was good. I had a Slimfast for lunch, which added to the good vibes of the day; don't read me wrong, I'm not a nerd, I'm not normally excited about school, lol. Tomorrow is the last day before spring break- that's why. And tomorrow isn't even a real school day, it's what we have called "Servathon". Tacky name, but a day off tradition school nonetheless. We get to wear jeans (at a private school, you get to look forward to that. Believe me.) and we go volunteer and stuff. Also, high school gets to leave at 1 pm, which is awesome.
Many crazy pictures will ensue.
Oh, and on Saturday *early* in the morning, I leave on our class trip! We're going to New England, which is going to be great. The part that I'm looking forward to the most is visiting Harvard, actually. Not that I could ever afford to go there, but it interests me anyway.

That being said, I have to go pack for it.

Skinny love and lattes to you all. Go grab a cup of coffee for yourself

[constance]

Have a great trip!! It sounds like fun. Visiting Harvard would be nice...so much history and tradition there. I love stuff like that....thinking about all the lives that have moved through that place, achieving great things.

Be safe!

constance