Anyone trying to stop bingeing and purging?

[michellestar]

[Caramel]

I am so sorry hunny, I know how it goes, sometimes you just want to roll into a little ball and cry.. .but hung in there, it will get better, I promise.
We can do this...

Take care Gorgeous

[thinisbeautiful]

My problem is that I can't seem to diet. At night i just find food to eat and then purge it up. So, I stopped trying to diet because i'm going to give in anyway. Every single night I bp. It's like I can't stop myself at night. I'm fine fasting during the day, but at night I get cozy in the bed with my covers on and the tv on, my almost 3 year old son in the next room and i bp for about 5 hours or so every single night! I know it's bad for me. I do, but don't want to stop. I love being able to eat anything and then being able to purge it up. I hate that it rots your teeth and is bad for your heart and your throat. I'm so sucked in now, i don't know how to get out. Recently I went 4 days with out purging, but i couldn't help but to binge. I couldn't take it any longer, my tummy was so full and i went to sleep that way! I only stopped briefly because my glands were so physically swollen. I just don't know how to stop now.

[michellestar]

[thinisbeautiful]

Before i brush my teeth at night, right after i'm done purging i swish with warm water and baking soda. Not sure if it helps, but i heard that from someone. I'm mostly scared that i'm just going to drop dead. I know it's really bad for my heart and can cause heart disease. I know that it's bad for my bones and can cause osteoporsis. The thing is I don't eat at all during the day nothing, just water. It's starting to catch up with me i'm tired and weak during the day and times where i feel i'm going to fall over. I know I should stop, but i'm so far in it now more than before. I don't remember what it is like to eat a "normal" amount of food without it turning into a binge. Another thing that's scary is that it's getting more difficult for me to purge now. It doesn't just flow out like it used to.

[michellestar]

[cflickster]

I don't know why we continue to hurt ourselves so much. I don't know about anyone else, but it hasn't gotten any easier in the last 8 years for me, the binging and purging. In fact, it hurts more than ever. I just got engaged, and I am finishing my second year of law school, I figured by this point in my life it would be over. But it continues... does anyone know how hard it is taking law school finals after being up all night purgeing. I don't see myself being able to let go of my ED completely, but I would love to be able to enjoy spending time trying on wedding dresses and picking out the menu for our reception.
If anyone has any support to offer, I would lvoe that. I know all the tricks to avoid bingeing, but I also know all of the tricks to avoid the tricks.

[thinisbeautiful]

How do you avoid binging? How do you sit in your bed at night watching tv and knowing you've got 5 hours or so to go to sleep and just sit/lay there without eating? I've been doing it every single night. I want to stop so badly and it's making me broke too! I go crazy if I can't bp! I'm going on vacation in 3 weeks with my 3 year old son and my sis-in-law and her 2 year old for 8 days! I've never gone that long without a bp. I don't know how to do it with her around. She's very perceptive and she'll know I'm doing it unless I'm open about it. I told her that I "used to". I'm going to be starving! I usually fast during the day. I don't know what I'm going to do on vacation. My other friends and family don't notice that I keep taking trips to the bathroom or take long showers. Does your soon to be hubby know that you bp? I miss being curvy, but getting there is scary. That means that I would have to binge without purging and I've been under 100 for the longest time.

[Londongaygirl]

I've always been able to restrict my food intake and only occasionally binged. Since I learnt how to make myself sick without putting my fingers down my throat, I now cannot stop myself. It seems so much easier. Although it's not! I never lose any weight doing it either.

Does anyone else know which stomach muscles to flex to make themselves vomit without sticking anything in their mouth? I've never heard of anyone being able to.

[michellestar]

I managed to go so long without purging (about three weeks, although once in there I purged like one mouthful of food and then stopped) but today I purged twice, and quite a lot each time

[thinisbeautiful]

How do you make yourself sick without putting your fingers down your throat? I flex my stomach while i'm doing it and it comes out a lot faster. I think it takes years experience and a lot of mind control to not use your fingers. Every once in a while i can do a little without my fingers, but not a whole session of purging. I'd love to be able to though.

[carmen12490]

i have been bulimic for about a year and a half now but started being able to purge not using my fingers about 3-4 months in to it. it may be easier but then that just enourages you do do it more frequently cos you now you wont need to spend hours in the bathroom so family members wont notice. i wouldnt recommend it because i assume everyone here wants to stop. i know i do. i get the same, binging in the evening, i can restrict all day but when i get home from college i pick at things in the fridge and then i think god thats too much, i may aswell eat more to make it easier to come up. now i have realised this i think i be able to overcome it.
xxx

[michellestar]

[thinisbeautiful]

You didn't answer my question!! How do you purge without your fingers? Is it all mind control? I cannot stop bp anyway, i fast during the day and at night i become this monster. For some reason I can't just sit in my bed with the tv on without binging, then of course i have to purge. I've been doing it everyday for so long now, I know i should stop, but i just can't. Even if there's no food for me to eat, i get real fidgety and then i tear through the house trying to find food to bp.

[terezarsm]

Hi,I am looking for someone who could support me and help - I already lost 17 kg (37 pounds) from fasting and sport - I am not officialy anorectic but have this problem.... (ehm I am 17) problem is that it changed. I was sick for two weeks and I HAD TO EAT I had a diet plan and had to eat it all. And now what its done and I am fine again I wanted to slowly get back on my "normal" food (just healthy and low callories things you know) but I just cant stop overeating... just today from the time I came from school I cooked three meals (realy realy sweet one, salat with mayonnaise and some veg and fried egg toast and I ate it all and everytime I went and vomited all...and still I need more...)oh crap, I know you know what I am talking about... please help me, I want to stop this before its late, I dont want this, this is bad! I want to loose weight and will do always but I dont want to overeat and do this silly things..... please can you write me at [ EMAIL REMOVED ] [ Click here to know why ] if have few seconds once at the time, or just give me some advices how to fight.... ehm PS: I am Czech so sorry for my bad english....